Paging Doctor Clooney

I feel like I am in an episode of ER. It is so dark outside. People are yelling and screaming. There is blood everywhere. It’s kind of gross. I feel so dirty looking at it. Father is carrying Claire in the house. Where is Doctor George Clooney when you need him? He can save the day while looking good.

My sister by another mother was shot! I think she was shot because Elle was envious of her blue hand bag. I know I would be jealous too. It is so blue and pretty. It would match Elle’s eyes so well, definitely worth shooting someone over. I would have shot Claire for it, too (but don’t tell her). Mommy is freaking out cause there is blood everywhere. She wants to go to the hospital. Father doesn’t want to go. His reasoning is that people will ask questions. Going by his “reasoning”, if she gets worse, won’t the doctors get wonder why she hasn’t been treated earlier anyways? Or why she’s dead? I don’t try to understand father’s caveman logic. Doesn’t the company has some hush doctors anyways. What’s a paper company without secret MDs on hand for those painful paper cuts?

I also over heard father saying something about Claire being a catalyst. It sounds like an illness; like cat scratch fever (a terrible disease, mind you!). I wasn’t really paying much attention to him talking. I was too busy thinking of how to get blood stains off of the couch. I wonder if you can buy Oxi Clean by the barrel? Oxi Clean is DA BOMB! Like this one time, I got sick after eating my dinner. I sort of up-chucked on Father’s favorite chair (I wasn’t even drinking, well I mean, all I had was a glass of Chardonnay, and maybe a martini…or two). I tried to walk away and act like nothing happened. It didn’t take father too long to notice something wasn’t right. He started to threaten me with a rolled up newspaper. Then, Mommy come out with this bottle and cleaned my mess. It did wonders to that stain! Who would have guessed that bearded men would know so much about stain removal? But, I would assume blood would be more difficult to get out, though. Let’s see Billy Mays clean this upseeees.

Wait, whhy can’t I typee thatttt great> I am staaaaarting to feeel weak. Ooh no, pleease Baby Jesus, let me bbe abble to fiinsh this post. I loove beein able to typpe and blog. I cannt go back being just a nmmoral dog; Iiii tojoo gdddd for taaa! I cccan’t go a day without my online gossip. Pleaase coome back poowers! Pleeeeeeeeeeez!@!!@!!!@~!~!