The first hit’s always the trickiest; at least it’s over and done with. Now, on to the real fun, the one reason I went into this dirty business to begin with! I get to kill a politician! But not just any lying scumbag, no, this one’s special. I get to kill a politician who sucks in the sack!
This can’t be done by just anyone, as Linderman knows. These tasks require a certain expertise in ninja skills. So I’m sticking to a strict plan God himself couldn’t deter me from.
An Inevitable Death
Stage 1:No more cover up.
I’ll pack a bag and leave silently in the night!
Stage 2: Kill a Cabby
Can’t risk taking a plane, looks like it’s time for a road trip.
Stage 3:
How can you visit the big apple with out stopping for some Moo Shu pork?
Stage 4: NBC
No self respecting assassin plans her quick escape without first stopping by the Ninja Bicycle Company.
Stage 5: Seduce and Strike
Use the man’s fever for the flesh against him to get him alone.
Stage 6: A Little Somethin’ Somethin’
While his defenses are down, move in for the kill!
Stage 7: Slip into the Shadows
Dressed in black spandex from head to toe, I’ll fade into the night and onto my ninja bike.
Hmm, you seem like a sassy lady. Wanna go out sometime? Of course, your seductions wouldn’t work on me, though, because I’m straight edge.
Peter stay away from my woman, or I’ll come after you like she’s going after you’re brother!
Niki, all this talk about murdering congressmen is turning me on…!
HEY Don’t Kill Nathan! He’s My Real Father After all! Dang You!
Peter, I think your straight edge has a few dings in it… last time I checked Niki was MARRIED!!!
OK. Can you STOP CALLING ME A WEENIE?! Damn! Yes, I said damn. You can ground me if you want, just don’t call me that. That’s all I wanted to say.