I guess I’m stuck in a box…damn Hiro.
At first I freaked out like a cat on an acid trip…
This is me freaking out.
But it was no use…Hiro screwed me over good. No, not like that, though it would have been preferable. After a while I calmed down a bit and began pretending I was a vampire. That got old pretty quick.
This is me freaking out some more.
But then it struck me, and I remembered I had a Blogger account. So I logged on to pass the time, and now here I am, and now I have time to reflect on my life, the universe, and everything that has passed from my wretched birth til now. But I’m not going to bother with all that of course. I’m stuck in a box for crying out loud.
When you think about it, (and I have unlimited time to think about it), it’s the ultimate irony…for me to be stuck in a box 6 feet under and yet be unable to die. (This is the sort of deep thought I can come up with after years of depth of thought.) What’s worse, this is the most boring thing ever. You know, he really didn’t have to put me in the one with the stupid poufs, that was just uncalled for. All I did was kill his dad, overreaction much? Maybe he’s just kidding…he’ll come get me in a little while…
Or maybe I just have to learn to accept it…and when I get out of here, I’m going to make that traitor suffer my vengeance, because I have learned nothing from the outcomes of all my previous murderous revenge plots. Don’t worry, I’ve got this one all planned out…
First I’m going to punch my way through this coffin lid, like the Bride in Kill Bill.
(The Bride is one of my inspirations by the way, I too aspire to run around killing people with a samurai sword in public places. The last time I did that, I got arrested.)
Then I’m going to dig my way out of the 6 feet of dirt until I reach the sweet sweet sunlight. It shouldn’t be a problem unless there’s concrete or something nasty like that.
Next I will express my umbrage at Carpface, whose betrayal I have never forgotten even after 400 years (what can I say, I told you I never forget a grudge.)
For him, my revenge is special. The first thing I will require is a giant mousetrap. I will lure the Carp into the mousetrap like a little fish into the jaws of a hungry shark. Then I will need a sexy Sylar, two steaming vats of oil, and a bowl of Spaghetti-O’s. I’m not sure what I need those for, because at this point I always seem to get stuck. It’s kinda hard to think when you’re stuck in a f***ing box.
This is all his fault. Hiro put me here, of all indignancies. He put me. In a box. A box!! How could he? He was more than a friend to me. I loved him. Through his love, I could have known redemption. But no, he stole my girlfriend, blew me up, and put me in a box. After all I had done, all I had become for him! Because of him!
I put my box in a box for you,
I put my box in a box for you,
I put my box in a box for…
No, no, that’s not right. This is no time for singing. I have to think of a revenge plot, and fast. Stupid Youtube videos.
Boy it sure is dark in here. I wish I had a flashlight!
Mmmm…Spaghetti-Os…
Me thinks you are hungry.
Too bad you can’t die like everyone else… Oh snap.
Oh! Lets ship Hiro and Adam to pass the time! *cheerleader clap*
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.
AH HA HA HA HA.
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
TYhats what you get for talking crap. KARMA. ITS KARMA. HAHAHAHAHA.
You know what your problem is? You have to think *outside* the box.
Terribly sorry for the bad joke. I couldn’t resist.
I love your blogs…all of you. Keep up the good work.
Hey Claire-turns out I really do know you nonbio dad! I put it in my blog!
Adam: This is a good time to try to see if Astral projection actually works.
Plus, try to find a weak spot in that tomb and try to dig a hole. You regenerate so it isn’t like you will stay injured.
Now that the Shanti virus is no more thanks to your failure I am free to kill Hiro my self—for what he did to me I will make him suffer—have a wonderful eternity in that box!!!!
ummmm i’m sorry but you killed his dad BUT you broke his hart HOW COULD YOU?!?!?!?! and Peter LOVED you too and you did the same thing, SHUN now you are in a box you should think about what you have done and hen you get out witch you will because Peter or Hiro will come back for you HOT body you should be happy with them and love them JEEZ for a guy who’s lived for 400 years REALLY needs to learn about love
sorry about any bad spelling
hilarous!