I entered the first challenge ready to go, full of the confidence that only a massive sugar rush could provide, thanks to Monica’s delicious cookies. I knew that this would be a tough contest, because even though I might be the most awesome alien among the pathetic robots of my school, here I was among some of the greatest of the great. Here, at the Sylar’s Bachelor mansion, we are an alien pantheon, and Sylar may very well be the most powerful alien of us all!
How could I compete with Nathan Petrelli’s playboy charm or Adam Monroe’s worldly sophistication? How could I duplicate the success of Molly’s eyelash-batting, even though my eyes are arguably prettier? 
“Um, hi,” I said, blushing. “I made you a mix CD.” I nervously tugged at the strings of my Transformers hoodie as I handed him the disc I burned—mostly Kylie Minogue, but also some J-Pop and techno. I took a deep breath before continuing. This was going to be more difficult than I thought. I got Claire to like me after I nearly hit her with a car and made her cry in class, and Elle and I hooked up after I helped HRG kidnap her. When have I ever flirted with somebody for real?
“You look beautiful in that dress, Sylar. You deserve to be on VH1, so millions of people could see how beautiful you are, and not just the readers of this blog. I mean, Flava Flav has bad teeth and Brett Michaels is just skeezy, but you, you’ve got it going on!” (So I watched a few reality shows to get ready for this. Whatever, I’ve still got my mad alien cred.) “And you know how to handle a timepiece, so I’m sure that you have a much bigger clock than Flava Flav!” 
Now was the time to build to a crescendo, to tap into that sugar-rush power! “I think I understand you, Sylar, I really do. It’s your destiny to take people’s brains, because you’re so awesome and so alien. Everyone else is pathetic compared to you. In fact, I know that I will never again meet anyone as powerful and gorgeous as you, so killing me would be a mercy.” Eh, maybe I went a bit overboard with that one. If Sylar doesn’t kill me after that, I’m sure Elle will. But whatever, I’m in it to win it.
“Take my body, Sylar! Take my brain!”
Well you successfully sounded like a creep dork, if that’s what you were aiming for.
My little brother’s idol is Flavor Flav.
Yeah, but Chuck D is what made Public Enemy worth listening to.
OMG I’m glad someone can truly appreciate my greatness! Even if aliens are icky, like ET.
Blasphemy!
You’re so not ever getting laid again.
Kylie Minogue…I think someone has already eaten this kids brain…
BTW…Stay away from Elle.
Never be yourself, kid. Not when you’re that much of a dork.
someone just kill him and get it over with
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Can I kill him? I haven’t killed anyone in a long time.